Beliefs: Love 'em or Leave 'em


Parent to Child:  You’re eight years old, you do what I tell you to do.

Parent:  What would you like to eat?
Child:  I’m not hungry.
Parent:  Well, you’re going to be in an hour.

Parent to Child:  Stop touching everything. You’re touching everything and then touching your face. That’s how you get sick. Stop touching things.

Parent to Child, after child drops glass:  I am upset with you. I am upset with you!

These are snippets of actual conversations that I overheard.  

If I ever wondered how I got trained away from my inner guidance, my natural impulses, it could be because well-meaning adults in my life offered me feedback similar to the above.

In fact, I probably said similar things to my children when they were younger. I didn’t come out of the fog until they were a few years old... the fog meaning the thick layers of beliefs that said, “I’m the adult, therefore I know better. I’m in control.”

Ha ha ha ha. I can barely write that without laughing. “I’m in control” ?!?  That’s a good one. Yet, it’s easy to see how one comes to believe such a notion. Using the above examples, innocent conclusions could be drawn by the child in each case:

  • I don’t know what to do; older people tell me what to do, and I tell younger people what to do because they don't know what to do.
  • My body doesn’t know when it is supposed to eat; I can’t trust my body; food won’t be available when I want it; I must eat when I am not hungry to protect myself.
  • Touching things will make me sick; I am vulnerable to things outside of me; my impulses to explore are bad and wrong; I must rely on other people to tell me how to learn; I need protection.
  • I am wrong and bad; I am responsible for other people’s peace and happiness.

Beliefs like these feel constrictive and conjure notions of limitation and lack. I can viscerally feel the constriction in my body when such a limiting belief is operating in full tilt. For example, I recently noticed that I was experiencing a sensation of gripping, of holding on; it happened to occur during a period in which I was preparing for an important event.

When I asked myself what was going on (which I do in quiet contemplation or meditation), a belief surfaced:  “I have to get it ‘right’ so that others will like me.” That’s a lot of pressure! No wonder my body was experiencing tension.

Because I would rather feel ease and flow, and expand my scope of experience in the world, I am electing to trade-in this old belief for a new one. I am growing and expanding, and want need my beliefs to keep up with me!

Today, I am trading in that outgrown belief for an updated one that feels more supportive and affirming: “I am divinely innocent and open to experience.” Ah, that feels better already!


What is one limiting belief that you have outgrown?

If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you’re right.
— Henry Ford


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