I realized that I was using my son.
I was using him to feel good about myself.
As he became a teenager, a feeling crept in. I ignored it until I could no longer. What was this feeling?
In a word, grief. I was grieving the loss of my little boy. Where did he go, that bundle of sunshine that lit me up with a level of loving energy so huge that it could hardly be contained in his little body?
Over the years, when I returned home after being out of town, my son would often greet me with an...
Space to allow the unfolding.
Space to feel feelings.
Space to come to a decision on one’s own accord, in a space of neutrality.
Nurturing, open, inviting.
Limitless potential. The offering of space.
Sometimes, I squash the space. Fill it with thoughts. Then, the thoughts influence, call forth, or magnetize, a response from the person with whom I am conversing, or from the situation I am experiencing.
For example, when my daughter was applying to high...
I asked my son to “tell me about class today,” and he immediately discerned that his teacher must have called me.
“What did she say?”
“Just tell me about class,” I responded.
“What did she say?” he repeated.
“I just want you to tell me about class.”
“Tell me what she said, first.”
“I’m asking YOU to tell me about class,” I reasserted.
And on we went, in this circular pattern, each of us...
I keep talking, despite my daughter’s plea.
“Would you stop?!” she begs.
I persist, rationalizing to myself, I’m the parent, she will benefit by listening to me.
“You’re making me feel sad. You’re making me feel like an idiot!”
Ouch. But I’m on a run, “Well, that’s your doing,” implicitly reminding her that no one can “make” us feel anything.
While the admonishment leaves my lips,...
Parent to Child: You’re eight years old, you do what I tell you to do.
Parent: What would you like to eat?
Child: I’m not hungry.
Parent: Well, you’re going to be in an hour.
Parent to Child: Stop touching everything. You’re touching everything and then touching your face. That’s how you get sick. Stop touching things.
Parent to Child, after child drops glass: I am upset with you. I am upset with you!
Man will always choose the good.
After dropping off my daughter at school, in the rain, with her expressing a blasé attitude about going to school, and hearing my less-than-enlightened exchange with her, I was overcome with the knowing that there is another way.
What would it be like to consciously create, right now, in this moment?
Understanding that this world is a projection of mind, a mind in which I have creative license, how and what would I like to...
Starting to understand what "choice" means... in a divine context in which our soul is running the show, our earthbound choice is whether to go with the flow or against it. That is the only real choice we face.
To be an astronaut or a ballerina, to marry someone, what to have for dinner... these are choices on one level, but they are downstream from where the real choice is happening, from where reality is being created.
The choice we are always making--whether consciously or by...
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